Parenting Priorities

On the last day of school, one of our student's (from a preschool class I taught) gave me this frame:

When I first opened it, I thought it must be for someone else.  Then the mom explained, "It's for the little girl you are trying to adopt.  I know she's not here yet, but I hope she will be soon." 

WOW!  The first "baby gift" given to our little "Joy"!  I just kept staring at it, wondering what her precious little face will look like.  It's hard to imagine, our "Gotcha Day"....

The day when we enter the orphanage and are allowed to hold our little girl for the very first time.  The day we hear the sound of her cry, her giggle, her voice.   

The day she meets her sister and brothers for the very first time!

The day we bring her...home.

I pulled this frame out again tonight and a heaviness came over me.

Will I be a good Mom to her? 

Will we be good parents?

Will there be enough of me to go around for all 4 children?

Am I doing the right things with Hannah, Jordan & Solon now?

Will they turn out okay in their teenage years?

Will we teach them everything they need to know?

These are the same questions that hang over every loving parent's heads.

What if..., what if..., what if...??????

As I laid the 'Princess' frame down, I glanced over to my Bible, just across the kitchen table. 

And God spoke to my heart again:

It's not about ME...

It's not about ME doing all the right things...

I cannot control their hearts -

The Heart - "the wellspring of LIFE" Proverbs 4:23

We can read every book on parenting.

We can give our children every toy.

We can give them all the best clothes.

We can protect them in every way possible.

We can lay down all the ground rules & set all the curfews.

We can be their number one fan in every sport & every activity.

 

But we CANNOT control our children's hearts.  

God has simply given us an opportunity to

be a reflection of Him to our children.

"To walk in the light as He is in the light" 1 John 1:7

He is the One who holds their hearts!

So, the question we must ask ourselves is:

Who are we reflecting to our children?

 Is it God?

Or is it the world?

Occasionally dragging our children to church, and hoping the Sunday School teacher and Children's Pastor will teach them all about the Bible (or good "morals"), just isn't enough! 

Too often, our parenting priorities are out of whack!:

*Work to provide the very BEST.

*Get our children involved in EVERY activity & EVERY sport.

*Entertain, entertain, entertain.

*Give, give, give.

*Then, occasionally, if we have time, we might go to church and maybe even pray before we eat.

So what should be our PRIORITIES in parenting?:

*Loving God & Loving People (Actions DO speak louder than words - & our children DO watch!)

*Praying (in all circumstances)

*DAILY devotion to God, to His Word and to our Family.

Everything else falls AFTER these priorities.  

We will mess up. We will fall. But we get up, and we keep going with God in the lead!

This is all He asks:

"Love the Lord your God with ALL your heart and with ALL your soul and with ALL your strength and with ALL your mind; and love your neighbor as yourself."

Luke 10:27

Two Sides

"Never forget...there are ALWAYS two sides to every story".  Not the easiest bite of humble pie to swallow, but certainly some of the best advice my mom ever gave me!

As we come to the close of yet another school year, I must admit, my ears will be grateful for a short break from the 10-year-old, 4th grade, girl drama!  We have officially entered the awkward and hormonal stage of raising a pre-teen.  Hannah hopped in the car today and said, "Mom, 'Susan' is no longer on my friend list!  And it's all because of a boy - a boy I don't even like.  He and I are just friends!"   

It seems like only yesterday, I was sitting on my rainbow-colored day-bed, listening to New Kids on the Block, and crying to my mom, "Why do girls have to be so mean?!"  Her response, "Leah, what did YOU say?  How did YOU respond to your friend?  What is HER side of the story?"  She never just jumped on my band-waggon nor added fuel to my fires.  She helped me point my accusing finger back towards me, instilling a life habit of  pausing to think...."There are always two sides to every story". 

So today, after listening for quite some time, I turned to Hannah.  "Well sweetie, do you think you responded the right way? Response is everything.  Do you think maybe you were a little grumpy today because you went to bed late last night and you're tired?" She sighed deeply.  It's evening now, and I think she is still chewing on my motherly advice.  OR maybe she has completely moved on, and I am just hoping for some divine moment when the light bulb comes on and she NEVER struggles in relationships again!  Ha Ha:)

I wish I could tell her that it will get easier as she gets older, but the sad truth is, adults can often be as petty as children.   Sometimes our flesh gets the best of us. 

But WHAT IF...Before we decide to accuse or before we lend an ear to gossip...
WHAT IF, we were to consider this:

THERE ARE ALWAYS TWO SIDES TO EVERY STORY
Would there be less fighting in schools? 
To consider that maybe the mean girl you hate is being abused at home-she's hurting.
Would we LOVE more and GOSSIP less?
To consider that we can know ALL the latest gossip, but don't love - we know nothing!
Would there be less division in churches?
To consider that just because you end a gripe-session with "We really need to pray for them" doesn't make the session permissible. 

"Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths,

but only what is helpful for building others up

according to their needs,

that it may benefit those who listen. 

And do not grieve the Holy Spirit or God,

with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. 

Get rid of all bitterness,

rage and anger,

brawling and slander,

along with every form of malice. 

Be kind and compassionate to one another,

forgiving each other,

just as in Christ God forgave you." 

Ephesians 4:29-32

WHAT IF Christ-Followers simply lived this out?

At the Feet of Jesus

Well my dear readers, "Joy-Full Creations" has kept me quite busy, and I have not been able to write any devotionals for a long time. 

First, I want to invite you to join me in a little praise & reflection time today - to give God the Glory He so greatly deserves!  We have been overwhelmed by the 'God Moments' since we first started this adoption journey.  Without fail, the Lord continues to strengthen our faith!  He is faithful!!!!

This is Solon helping us at Lowe's :)

1.  The blessing of a servant's heart - HUGE Praise:  We are finally able to buy our wood in bulk for my Joy-Full Creation Crosses.  We have been blessed with an amazing friend who is now cutting the crosses for us and saving us money so that more profit can go towards the adoption!  Praising God & VERY thankful for a friend with such a servant's heart!

This is a view of our Joy-Full Creations Factory - Also known as, our living room.

  2. The blessing of our home - When we bought this house, the living room was very small.  AGAIN, the Lord provided (in miraculous ways that we will never be able to repay) for a wall to be torn down.   This remodel opened up space in our home for youth, youth workers, our growing family,

AND the Joy-Full Creations Factory:)

3.  The blessing of unexpected generosity -  At a women's retreat a few weeks ago, a sweet lady gently took my hand and placed a $100 check in it.  Her words, "I am praying for you and just want to help you bring that little child home. " WOW - Speechless! 

The other evening I went to deliver a recent order.  She handed me her payment, and right before I started to leave, she and her husband handed me a very generous donation.  God did it again - He continues to make our steps towards adoption "firm".

 

"If the Lord delights in a man's way,

He makes his steps firm;

Though he stumble, he will not fall,

For the Lord upholds him with his hand."

Psalm 37:23-24 

I share these praises to give God glory and also to remind you: 

Have FAITH.

TRUST God.

When He calls you to something - He is faithful to the end!

Now, for a little Devotional time.....

When I paint, our dog Maggie often lays across my feet.  In my painting time I do a lot of praying and thinking.  As Maggie laid across my feet the other night,  I started to think about all the stories in Scripture that refer to people at the feet of Jesus:

Matthew 9:20 - The bleeding woman grabs the edge of Jesus' cloak for healing. 

Luke 8:35 - the healed demon-possessed man was found "sitting at Jesus' feet"

Luke 8:41 - Jarius fell at Jesus feet and pleaded for his daughter.

John 12:3 - Mary of Bethany anoints the feet of Jesus with perfume. 

What a humble place to be - at the feet of Jesus. 

It seems that I only find myself in this posture in desperate times...those times when I am just begging God for something - healing, help, guidance a plea for my children.  In these first three stories of scripture, healing is exactly what the people found.  But something strikes me about Mary's story. 

She didn't WANT anything from Jesus. 

She wasn't begging for healing, help or guidance.

She wasn't worried about what anyone would think of her.

She wasn't worried about how she looked - Mary's hair was covered with a mud-like substance, consisting of the dirt from Jesus' feet mixed with the fragrant perfume.

Mary's posture was a beautiful act of worship!

Many people had already begun to turn from Jesus at the time this story took place.  It took place only days before his crucifixion.  But Mary was faithful to the end. 

Not for selfish gain or recognition.

But because she loved her Savior.

We all have needs/desires and yes, God wants us to come to him - to ask ANYTHING in His name. But He also wants us to just BE STILL.

In this fast-paced world we are all busy, but if we only talk to Him when we want something,

then maybe we are just TOO busy. 

STOP. 

BE STILL

MAKE TIME to just

SIT AT THE FEET OF JESUS!!

 

Clay in His Hands? 

The other day, a friend of mine came to pick up a frame she had ordered from Joy-Full Creations (one of our fund raisers).  After she left, Solon (our youngest) looked up at me and said, with a huge grin,
"Okay Mom, NOW can we adopt a little sister"?

On another occasion, we had some teenagers from our ministry over to our house, and Solon was playing tag with one of the girls.  His instructions to her:
"You run, and I will chase you...and when I tag you, I adopt you!  Okay?"

He melts our hearts and he cannot WAIT to meet his little sister. 

If only adoption were as simple as Solon imagines it to be!
There are over 130 MILLION orphans in this world!  But sadly, the average cost for an international adoption is 20 to 30 thousand dollars.  And that, alone, keeps so many from pursuing adoption.  I have said, from the very beginning, that I knew this would be a HUGE mountain to climb. 

There are days we get impatient.
There are days we doubt our ability.
There are days we feel overwhelmed with the length of the process.
There are days our minds race with questions.
There are days we worry about finances...

I cannot lie... I often regret some of our financial decisions - which stem from getting tangled in the web of the "American Dream" -
Nice clothes, nice house, nice 'stuff'', nice car....And then I read in Luke chapter 12 -

"Sell your possessions and give to the poor. 
Provide purses for yourselves that will not wear out,
a treasure in heaven that will not be exhausted,
where no thief comes near
and no moth destroys.
For where your treasure is,
there your heart will be also."
Verses 33-34

Its not that I think God doesn't WANT to bless us, in many different ways (including nice "stuff").  He has just brought, to my attention, that my "treasure" has often been my "stuff" and THAT is not where my heart is to be! 

God is molding us through this process.  He is shaping us.  He is the potter and we are the clay.  Often, the shape HE chooses, takes us out of our comfort zones and increases our faith.

HE is making a way for us to give HIS precious child a
HOME -
A roof over her head.
A bed to snuggle into at night. 
A family that loves her.
A feeling of safety and security. 
And most of all, a family that will help nurture the path to her Creator...
For her to understand that she is the daughter of a King - King Jesus!

Has God been calling you to something that could potentially take you out of your comfort zone?
Are you clay in His hands?
Will you let Him stretch you?
Will you let Him mold you today?
Don't 'dry up' and become immovable. 
LET Him shape you. 
Trust Him, even when it's hard. 

As we are moved, under the gentle guidance of His hands...
HIS glory will be revealed.

Top News: Petrino's Sins & My Sins

We've lived in Arkansas for five years now, and as a Texas girl, I have always had a great admiration for the devotion of Hog Fans.  I'm proud to admit, all three of our children now know how to call the hogs!  But Arkansas fans, everywhere, are saddened by the poor choices of Coach Bobby Petrino, which ultimately led to the firing of a (once great) leader. 

It's everywhere:  Facebook, Twitter, and the News - ALL covering the
Top Story:  "Coach Bobby Petrino-FIRED". 

Yes, Petrino lied and tried to cover his tracks.
Yes, he made VERY poor choices.
Yes, he broke contract, and there are consequences for that.

But I can't help imagining what it must be like to be in his shoes, and all morning long, I have been thinking of a man from scripture with a very similar story. 

A man who lied and tried to cover his tracks.
A man who committed adultery & even murdered.
A man named David.  A great and mighty leader.

He defeated the giant, Goliath, and gave Israel a great victory. (1 Samuel 17:1-58)
He was later anointed as King of Judah, according to the Lord's instructions, 
(2 Samuel 2:1-4) And then King of all Israel.
His Kingdom expanded & he was a MIGHTY Leader.
In time, he committed adultery with Bathsheba.
He then had Bathsheba's husband murdered to cover up their sin.

BUT GOD...

Still used David.

David repented: 
"Have mercy on me, O God, according to your unfailing love; according to your great compassion blot out my transgressions.  Wash away all my iniquity and cleanse me from my sin."
Psalm 51:1-2

Petrino's sins made top news because he was the leader of the Great Arkansas Razorbacks.
David, is written about in scripture, because he was a mighty leader.
And Bobby Petrino is held accountable for his own actions just like David was.

The truth is, we can point our finger at a fallen leader,
But, WE ARE ALL LEADERS.

Fathers - leading their families.
Mothers - leading their children.
Presidents - leading a company.
Workers - leading everyone around them.
Teachers - leading students.
Students - leading their classmates.
I can't think of ANYONE who doesn't have eyes looking up to them (whether they know it or not).

We ALL need to point the finger at ourselves

and really take time to reflect on our own leadership.

If our sins were exposed, what would the Top News read?
"Father Addicted to Pornography"
"Mother's Secret Texts & Facebook Messages Exposed"
"President of Company Neglects Family To Pursue Wealth"
"Local Worker Cheating on Spouse"
"Teacher Gossips About Co-Workers"
"Student Having Premarital Sex"

May God convict us ALL of our sins.
May we not just ignore this conviction and justify our sins, but
May we REPENT and TURN AWAY.
May WE cry out to God:

"Have mercy on me, O God, according to your unfailing love; according to your great compassion blot our my transgressions. Wash away all my iniquity and cleanse me from my sin...

Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me...Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me."
Psalm 51

On This Day...

On this day I will be busy. 
So much to do, and not enough time to do it.
Work, Laundry to fold, a house to clean, meals to cook and everyone to care for.

But will I remember the business Jesus was about today?
He carried the burden of the sins of this world upon His shoulders.
He had one task on His mind.  One task to complete.


On this day I will go shopping for Easter Clothes.
I will go to the grocery store to prepare for Easter lunch.
I will stress about finances, with the beeping of the registers.


But will I consider the cost of my sins?
He could not eat, or drink, and it was not a day of celebration for Him.
He paid the ultimate price, worth far more than ALL of my earthly treasures.

On this day my phone will ring.
I will chat about the casual things of life,
Considering what fun things to plan for the weekend.

But will I listen to the ringing in my ears?
The ringing of each time the hammer fell,
And drove the massive nails into His hands and feet?

On his day I will hear the shouting of thousands of sports fans.
It's opening day of baseball season,
And the fans are on their feet.

But will I hear the shouting of the people?
"Crucify Him!  Crucify Him!"
"If you're King of the Jews, then save yourself"!


On this day, I may feel alone.
Wishing someone could just understand.
I may groan and complain because of circumstances.

But will I feel the rejection Jesus felt?
"My God, My God.  Why have you forsaken me"?
The ugliness of my sins, so horrible, that God had to turn away.

On this day, He cried-
"It is finished". 

"God made him who knew no sin to be sin for us, SO THAT in him we might become the righteousness of God." 2 Cor. 5:21


On this day...
May I remember what Jesus did!
May I consider the cost of my sins!
May I listen to the hammer ring!
May I hear the shouts of the people who did not recognize their Savior!
May I feel the rejection, and understand it's magnitude!

Not just on this day, but EVERY DAY,
May I remember ALL of this,
And rejoice, that it did not end at the cross!

Out of the Overflow of the Heart, the "Status" Speaks

The world of Social Media has exploded to levels we never imagined possible!  We have become social butterflies through a simple, yet complex device called a cell phone.  Sitting in a restaurant, at a sporting event, even driving in your car - everywhere you look, people are on their phones; Checking twitter, e-mails, texting, checking Face Book or updating a status.  It's everywhere!  We've come a LONG way from Bag Phones!  :)

Do you remember our first form of texting?  If you had a pager or a calculator you could write 07734:  "HELLO" upside down.  From there, the first text message was sent (only 20 years ago) in 1992.  And according to Wikipedia, the first 3G Web access from a cell phone happened only12 years ago. Now, we have everything at our fingertips!  Forget 3G, we've got 4G!

No more "chain calls"
No more waiting to get home to check our messages on our answering machines.
No more waiting to get to a computer to check e-mails.

We have group texting, mass e-mails, and Facebook access in a split second - with a "Status Update" we can tell EVERYONE in our "friend group" exactly what's on our minds:

"I've folded all the laundry, cleaned the entire house, AND worked out"
"Have you seen the movie...?"
"I need a vacation"
"I hate Mondays"
"I AM SO MAD!!!....."

Freedom of Speech; it's a beautiful thing.  But, as a believer, what will I do with this freedom?  How will I use this freedom?  I can say whatever I want on Facebook! Not only that, but I can get people to "like" my status (thumbs up) and if I'm lucky, they will "comment" and back me up in my efforts for justice when "I am MAD". 

"A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart.  For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of".

Luke 6:45

"For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks"  Matthew 12:34b

What we say is a reflection of what's in our hearts?  Does that apply in the world of social media?  Isn't it just easier to write out our frustrations through a text or a status update?  Then, we can be as brutally honest as we want to be and not worry about the repercussions.   

"If your brother sins against you,
go and show him his fault just between the two of you"

Matthew 18:15

Go to our brother (or sister) if they sin against us?  This is HARD!!! 

It's the battle of the flesh and the spirit. 

Once again, I am reminded that Jesus did not take the easy road out when He walked this Earth.  He did not respond the way the world responded. 

He did not live the way the world lived. 

He was different from the world, even when He was persecuted by the world. 

"Be very careful, then, how you live - not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil."  Ephesians 5:15-16

The Days ARE evil, and Satan can often gain a foothold in our lives through power of Facebook:  Comparison, Jealousy, Connections with old flames, Criticism, Judgement and more.

BUT GOD

Can use it for good!

Don't get me wrong.  I'm not saying Facebook is a bad thing.  But, I do believe we've been given this unbelievable opportunity to reach, encourage and help hundreds and even thousands of lost and hurting people through the platform of social media. 

"Go into all the world and preach the good

news to all creation."  Mark 16:15

Are we making the most of this opportunity

OR

Is it just one more way of building another idol in our lives - 

an idol in the shape of ourselves?